You Don't Know Trak

Yeah, I'm still excited about it. Even without Gibberish Questions, which they were already kinda sick of doing by the time The Ride dropped, it's still an awesome package. I'm even considering double dipping for the PC version.

Recent news about the NGP - which, I'm wagering is just the codename for Sony's sequel to the PSP - has gotten some the usual launch hysteria. It's a hell of a nice looking device and feature packed to the brim, though it has decided to forgo the 3D route for now. Which is fine by me; 3D is a theater kind of thing. An extra inch or so of depth on a portable isn't exactly something I drool over, but an OLED screen? Awesome.

Of course, this being the internet, I couldn't help but eventually run into some incredibly fucking dumb criticism of this just-now-announced system. One source was from Penny Arcade. PENNY FUCKING ARCADE. Now granted, I don't always think Tycho's on the ball about this stuff. I don't understand how he can get into a furniture-chomping, pants-shitting unholy rage about PlayStation Home - a service which costs nothing and is optional - and merely harrumph about his console of choice having a hardware failure large enough to make it a doorstop. I thought he was down right ill in la cabeza when he decided to buy 2 copies of FFXIII- one for each platform - in some misguided and unnecessary attempt at using his purchase as a vote for multiplatform support.

But this takes the fucking cake.

I really hope they're just joking.

In the event that this is seriously what they thought, let's address the "If they could tell people the price without freaking them out, they would!" nonsense.

The Nintendo 3DS was officially announced as existing on June 15, 2010. The price and release dates were not announced until JANUARY OF THIS GODDAMN YEAR. For the mathematically challenged, that's 6 months plus. So unless Penny Arcade just decided they weren't going to be that hard on Nintendo because of reasons only they know, this is a stupid argument to make. It's a fanboy argument, to be frank.

And hey, I have my own gripes. PR people are not supposed to be responding with questions about price with "It will be affordable." For one, that's not their call, it's ours. For two, that's not all that comforting coming from a man in a dapper suit who makes more in a quarter than I do in a year. "Affordable" can mean a lot of things. College is apparently more affordable than ever, but you're still going to be taking out loans to cover it.

Look, I understand; the NGP is banging. It's loaded with awesome hardware. And for reasons beyond me, people seem to think adding a rear-touchpad is going to be a bank breaker. But could we try to give the hardware that was just announced 4 days ago a little time? There's nothing in those specs that is so space age that this thing has any reason to be all that expensive. And if it is? Don't buy the goddamn thing, and even better, don't even fucking talk about it.