My Nightly Dose of Rage

God. Damn. It.

I'm really getting sick and tired of people who can't properly use English on a forum. And yes, I"m making an exception for those from another country. After I learned Japanese, I started realizing how each language has its own concepts and rules. I'm not looking for Queen's English, either; I'm sure that by the time this paragraph is done, I'll have left enough mistakes in it to attract a college professor's red pen.

But enough is enough! For fuck's sake!

Here's an example: I'm looking around my main gaming forum, when I spot this gem:

"Street Fighter IV is a reborn of fighting games" is total bullshit.

Now never mind the fact that this sentence is somewhat awkwardly formed and the quote is unnecessary. That's an easy one.

I had the great misfortune of taking Senior-level editing at University of Arizona, which means I only proofread what I write once if I'm feeling lazy that day. And I understand the purpose of communication is to convey ideas, so I don't mind slang or somewhat less-than-stellar performance.

However, I would say that if anybody uttered that sentence within an earshot of me, my eyes would become aglow with crimson flame as I seek out the offender, and, upon getting them to face me, proceed to rip them in half right down their prime meridian. I am not, as they say, a "grammar nazi", as only one of us is engaging in a crime against language mores. I'm really just wantonly overprotective of my senses and what they take in.

Part of this problem can also be explained by the iPhone, which has the issue of putting in word suggestions automatically (depending on your configuration) unless you tap on them. Which is kind of like saying "you're having brocolli for dinner unless you say you want brocolli for dinner." Nothing like having a device do something out of spite. "Oh, you wanna ignore my suggestion? Fuck you, then. Hope you meant to text your wife that you were going to Whorehouse and not Whole Foods." Still, a cursory glance before somebody presses the post button will reveal that you're about to post something that doesn't make any sense.

In fact, such a practice would make the internet almost legible. Perish the thought.

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While I'm at it, let me bring up a gaming related issue: Death, crotch rot and chlamydia to every single person in the fucking "WWAAAAAHH!!! WHY WON'T SQUEENIX REMAKE FFVII?!!!" camp. Die in a car fire already. First off, you're wasting your goddamn time. Nobody's even started on this idea because THEY'RE TAKING FOREVER TO DO EVERYTHING ELSE. FFXIII was in development hell, XIII Versus is now in its place, and Nomura said he wants to do something with Kingdom Hearts (though, just to prove they still have their heads up their asses, he says he wants to do something to continue the main storyline, but not call it a part 3.)

There is absolutely NO FUCKING REASON WHATSOEVER that anybody on this planet should be starving for more FFVII. At all. Under any circumstances. How many more shitty games and overwrought CGI Fanwanks do you need to take place in FFVII's story before you get the hint? IT WILL SUCK. I'm sorry Square had to give the original such a shitty, blue-balls unsatisfying ending, but this why we move on instead of dwelling on it.

This is the same denial Chrono Trigger fans go through when they say the want Chrono Trigger 2, despite every effort by Square to let them know that they're not interested in the continued adventures of Crono, Marle and Lucca. Aren't Radical Dreamers and Chrono Cross proof enough otherwise, especially considering how convoluted Cross' story was and how much of the Trigger story was wrecked?

But you know what? I hope it gets released. Because I know that, much like Dawn of Mana destroyed the Seiken Densetsu fanbase, it will be shitty enough to kill the FFVII fanbase off, hopefully for good.

Oh, and Sephiroth is a momma's boy.

Gundam and other sex crimes

Gundam Vs. Gundam Next Plus on PSP is, without a doubt, the most fun I've had playing a Gundam game so far. One only need consider the American Gundam library- or as I call it, the tripe we've had to put up with for being on the other side of the Pacific- to understand that that while that's high praise, it's not a large amount of it. It's like a pole vaulter who beats the High School record while failing to get a world record: sufficient, but there's certainly room for improvement.

As a fighting game fan, I know a cheap boss when I see one. That I know how to beat the likes of Jinpachi, Goenitz, and Magaki, et al., is proof that I can handle a cheap boss when given time to get to know them better. The boss battles in GVGN+ take the concept of a cheap boss and instead turn it into a very, very unfun version of "monkey in the middle". I'm not sure if the phrase "gangrape" would be inappropriate; in fact, it may be underselling the experience.

Let me begin by stating one problem that has persisted from the original GvG: You are given an AI controlled partner who serves two functions:

1)Jack all of your kills when the enemy is being easy, or even just moderately difficult

2)Sit in the background when a high level enemy comes into play. Due to camera issues, I can't visually verify if it's indeed sitting, nor whether it's thumb is, in fact, occupying its rectal area. But I have my suspicions.

This is annoying enough when your opponent is Nu Gundam, which actually means you have roughly 8 enemies, including its partner and the bits it shoots out . It becomes downright tedious when you're near the end of a route and the computer has decided the game has been sufficiently fun by that point and turns on you viciously.

Unfortunately, Namco/Bandai has also decided that a mere "boss" is insufficient. Which I'd agree with, if said bosses weren't mechanized death factories loaded with numerous versions of death blossoms and other patently unfair advantages such as super armor. No, we get the "boss stage", wherein we fight two mobile suits of the game's choosing (usually 3000 point level suits from the Gundam Overpowered Collection)at the aforementioned high difficulty. Then, and only then, we are greeted by one of the villains of the numerous Gundam timelines in their huge, ultra-mecha.

They are flanked by the 2nd-most powerful suit in their series.

It's sad that the most innocent crime in all of that is violation of canon. Your Gundam is suddenly thrust into a nightmare situation: run the fuck away and spam your beam rifle, or stand there while Nu Gundam, Alpha Azieru and all 12 of their bit/funnel weapons shoot lasers at you. When they're not doing that, you will undoubtedly try to take on the Alpha, which practically gift wraps your suit with a tag that says "To Amuro Ray: Please sodomize me". Presumably, your AI partner is somewhere filming you getting backjacked until you explode,and eventually, you lose enough that the difficulty ramping eases up and you can just barely win out.

Isn't it enough that the target suits are unholy machina bent on your destruction? Do they really need a tag team partner just in case their Fuck You Beam didn't penetrate through to destroy your backside? One battle pitted me against 2 Zetas, complete with temporary god mode enabled, followed by Nu Gundam and ZZ Gundam, followed by 3 HYAKU SHIKIS and Gundam Unicorn. Such a lineup would be an appropriate defense if, say, the very constructs of Time and Space suddenly became violently malicious.

Alas, I still play, and I still have things to unlock. But it saddens me that this genre, which is suffering from decent games, now has to suffer the same overblown challenge-mode bullshit that fighting games put themselves through. It doesn't lead me to better myself; I'm playing as well as can be expected. It leads me to abuse a tactic because it's the only one an overwrought enemy AI didn't plan for.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get back to flying my amazing Gundam DX in a complete circle while beating the fuck out of the square button. Fun, huh?

Just Call Me 'Ransoomair'

Or however the hell his name is spelled at VGCats, where the updates come as early as the next season. I'm starting to get as bad, but hopefully I can change that soon.

Steam has gotten me to do something I haven't done in years, which is: stock my computer with gaming goodies. For less than 45 dollars, I picked up a bunch of stuff that I had missed and otherwise would've had to buy a 360 for. While I don't hold any more or less disdain for the system than ever, It's really hard for me to pick up another system: currently, I'm rocking 4 of them, including my PSP. And each one has some semblance of a backlog, with my PS2 being the worst- not only do I have a lot of games to get through, they're all quite long, and this is all balancing with work, trying to take care of the apartment, A+ certification studying, getting ready for Fanime, working on a screenplay and coming soon: School.

One thing I will say about the PSP backlog: It got one game shorter. Not because I finished anything, but because I tried playing Tekken 6 on it. The PSP version might be easier to unlock things with, but it leaves a lot to be desired. At least it doesn't have a story mode.

Many of these games are of the Japanese Gundam Game variety, including ones like Another Century's Episode 2 and 3. Sure, there's other suits, but anybody who knows me knows that I bought ACE 3 for a chance to play through a story mode based on Gundam X. I'm already traipsing through part 2 using Kou Uraki, and while I haven't heard his trademark howling of Gato's name, I sit in comfort knowing it won't be long until I do. Also, REALLY looking forward to nuking something with the GP02A. Perhaps a Gundam Wing character or two.

As for this year: yikes, there's a ton of new stuff. Part of the reason I'm trying to get through some of my PS3 backlog is to trade in for new stuff this year, and even then, I'm still behind. There's a lot I missed from last year, such as Katamari Tribute and Uncharted 2. I will be hesitant on picking up Final Fantasy XIII, as readings of some of the features suggests that Versus XIII may stand a better chance of being good. There's also been an announcement of an announcement- something I've come to downright loathe- from Tetsuya Nomura, that a long-talked about game is coming, finally. I won't speculate on what this is, but suffice to say, unless it involves a ps3 and a keyblade, I don't give a shit.